
Dealing With Temper Tantrums In The Office
Dealing With Temper Tantrums in the Office
Imagine an office place where everyone behaved in a calm, rational, and adult manner. Wow, what a concept! Unfortunately, some people never completely grow up no matter their position in the company. From the mail room all the way up to the CEO in some cases, many people have adult bodies with the mentality of a two year old.
Like two-year-olds, people who throw temper tantrums believe they are entitled to get their own way. This group often includes immature high-level executives who believe that having power gives them the right to treat others any way they like. They feel free to abuse anyone who gets in their way.
However, the simple truth is that adult temper tantrums are a learned behavior. By the age of two the young child has learned that he or she can get anything they want, exactly when they want it by crying and screaming. The sad truth is that the child carried this immature behavior into adulthood– and it still works. It still gets them what they want because the adults on the opposite end of this childish onslaught keep letting them get away with it. We never confront them or tell them, “No!” As a result the behavior is constantly reinforced as an infantile mechanism for getting your own way. It’s juvenile, immature, silly and very sad. What a crime that some people never grow up. They also have no clue as to what others are thinking about them.
If you have to deal with immature bosses, coworkers, employees, or team members, I hope the four suggestions below will help you keep your sanity.
- The best response to a tantrum is no response at all. Stay quiet and calm until the person is relaxed and ready have a civilized conversation. Let them rant and rave without interruption until they run out of steam and are deflated. Never interrupt them or argue back. Never ask them to calm down or change their feelings. All of this will backfire on you. You can pass the time by watching their behavior in amazement and try to be entertained by it. If you try really hard you’ll find that their infantile displays can be very amusing.
- Never show fear, anger, or any other emotional response, since that will be very rewarding to the individual throwing the tantrum. Always remember that people act in certain ways because they have been taught there is some type of pay-off for their behavior. When someone acts this childish, you must be the adult. Your anger and fear can add fuel to the tantrum, and at the same time you are teaching them that they have control over you. You have taught them that the best way to get an emotional response from you is for them to have a “hissy fit.” You have taught them how to push your buttons. For your own safety, peace of mind, and mental health; it is critical that you never reveal your buttons to anyone—EVER! This can be your down fall since corporate America has so many people who enjoy pushing other people’s buttons.
- Maintain your confidence and composure during this difficult situation. These are the qualities of an exceptional leader. Use relaxed body language, soft eye contact, and a gentle, respectful tone of voice to reduce the “emotional temperature” of the cry-baby adult.
- Although it’s tempting to avoid each other after a negative outburst or conflict; my research shows that it’s better to try and keep the peace. In all of my seminars and trainings we teach our clients about treating each other with respect. This is a major key to enhancing productivity.
If you are a manager or supervisor who is not known for emotional outbursts, then teach your team to strive for open, honest conversations and problem solving. Teach your team to acknowledge situations that result in disagreements without an angry exchange. If this does not help, then give the whining co-worker a rattle, a bib and a bottle.
I wish you luck and success!
About the Author
John Eric Jacobsen was born to teach and destined to be a motivator. In 1985 John founded “Jacobsen Business Programs, Inc.” (JacobsenPrograms.com), a corporate seminar company helping people to succeed personally and professionally.
John’s experience is what sets him apart. With a diverse background in business, sales, communications, theatrical arts, dance and acting; John has the unique ability to not only be a great entertainer, but also an amazing teacher. He has trained and worked with over a half a million people and has performed or taught all over America on stage and on TV.
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Cost Of Bad Behavior: How Incivility Is Damaging Your Business And What To Do About It $11.89 Why incivility at work is a bigger problem than you suspect In an accessible and informative style, Pearson and Porath examine the toll that bad behavior can have on otherwise well-functioning companies. And they reveal strategies that successful organizations are using to stop incivility before it takes hold. Whether it’s a standoffish coworker or an arrogant boss, incivility at the office doesn’t just affect the moods of a few employees; it hurts an entire company. Consider these statistics: 12 percent of all employees say they’ve left jobs because they were treated badly. Fortune 1000 executives spend roughly seven weeks per year resolving employee conflicts. And an astonishing 95 percent of Americans say they’ve experienced rudeness at work. Christine Pearson and Christine Porath examine the devastating toll that bad behavior can have on otherwise well-functioning companies. Combining their own scientific research with stories from fields as diverse as criminology, education, and psychology, they show how to spot the roots of incivility, rip them out, and create a culture of respect. They urge managers to stop making excuses, set a zero-tolerance policy, and lead by example. Bestsellers like The No Asshole Rule and The Power of Nice have shown the hunger for more civility at work; now The Cost of Bad Behavior shows exactly what to do about it.Why incivility at work is a bigger problem than you suspect In an accessible and informative style, Pearson and Porath examine the toll that bad behavior can have on otherwise well-functioning companies. And they reveal strategies that successful organizations are using to stop incivility before it takes hold. Whether it’s a standoffish coworker or an arrogant boss, incivility at the office doesn’t just affect the moods of a few employees; it hurts an entire company. Consider these statistics: 12 percent of all employees say they’ve left jobs because they were treated badly. Fortune 1000 executives spend roughly seven weeks per year resolving employee conflicts. And an astonishing 95 percent of Americans say they’ve experienced rudeness at work. Christine Pearson and Christine Porath examine the devastating toll that bad behavior can have on otherwise well-functioning companies. Combining their own scientific research with stories from fields as diverse as criminology, education, and psychology, they show how to spot the roots of incivility, rip them out, and create a culture of respect. They urge managers to stop making excuses, set a zero-tolerance policy, and lead by example. Bestsellers like The No Asshole Rule and The Power of Nice have shown the hunger for more civility at work; now The Cost of Bad Behavior shows exactly what to do about it. |
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Behavior in Organizations $149.93 "Behavior in Organizations" shows readers the real world of OB through its blend of cutting-edge research and practical applications. The Field of Organizational Behavior; Organizational Justice, Ethics, and Corporate Social Responsibility; Perception and Learning: Understanding and Adapting to the Work Environment; Individual Differences: Personality, Skills, and Abilities; Coping with Organizational Life: Emotions and Stress; Work-Related Attitudes: Prejudice, Job Satisfaction, and Organizational Commitment; Motivation in Organizations; Group Dynamics and Work Teams; Communication in Organizations; Decision-Making in Organizations; Interpersonal Behavior at Work: Conflict, Cooperation, Trust, and Deviance; Power: Its Uses and Abuses in Organizations; Leadership in Organizations; Organizational Culture, Creativity, and Innovation; Organizational Structure and Design; Managing Organizational Change: Strategic Planning and Organizational Development For human resources managers, general managers, team-builders, and personnel specialists. |
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Chain of Office $14.99 Chain of Office |
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The Evolution Of Behavior $10.39 The work exposes many of our cultural endeavors as fundamental aspects of animal behavior. If you want to know why we kneel when we pray why women use lipstick or why people commit atrocities this book will give you the answers. |
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Mindless Behavior Stage Poster $10 36″ x 24″ Poster featuring a Mindless Behavior on-stage group photo. |
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Mindless Behavior Logo Necklace $20 Chain necklace with spring ring clasp and 2″ Mindless Behavior logo charm. |
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Applied Behavior Analysis: Principles and Procedures in Behavior Modification $73.5 Applied Behavior Analysis: Principles & Procedures for Modifying Behavior provides today’s students with a handbook to help them design and conduct interventions to modify behaviors when they enter professional careers. This text will serve as a resource for students who plan to become behavior analysts to design and conduct interventions to change clients’ behaviors. |
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Criminal Behavior $79.82 Criminal Behavior explores crime as a developmental process from birth through early adulthood. It further examines the role that legal, political, and criminal justice systems play in the development of criminal behavior. Criminal Behavior: takes into account biological, genetic, developmental, familial, social, educational, cultural, political, and economic factors correlated with crime; references actual cases and events to serve as examples of the principles introduced; critically examines the roles of the criminal and juvenile justice systems and methods of punishment in the development of and response to criminal behavior; explores the effects of crime on victims and looks at correlations between crimes and victim characteristics and behaviors; examines the role of childhood and adolescent behavioral and mental health disorders in the development of criminal behavior; and investigates the differences between criminals and the rest of society, and the differences and similarities between and among criminals. Chock-full of personal anecdotes, this engaging text is unique in that it combines the experience of Doug Bernstein, a clinical psychologist and a successful textbook author, and Elaine Cassel, a practicing attorney who regularly teaches psychology and law. Organized around five dimensions related to the causes, characteristics, and consequences of crime, the book summarizes the programs that research suggest offer the best hope for doing a better job of dealing with crime in the 21st century. The authors argue that prevention is the key to dealing with crime, and present comprehensive suggestions for crime prevention. The new edition features the latest criminal statistics available, as well as the most current research on the causes and correlations of crime and violence. Other highlights include: discussion of the latest brain-imaging research in psychopathy – how psychopaths’ brains are different from normal brains; the latest on gang activities and how their venues have migrated to suburban and rural areas; terrorism and its roots; Internet crimes, especially sexual predator crimes; the latest research on how media violence, especially violent interactive video games, contributes to criminal behavior; the examination of drug and mental health courts as alternatives to punishment; and recent Supreme Court rulings eliminating the death penalty for juveniles and the mentally retarded. Intended as a textbook for upper-level courses on criminal behavior, psychology and law, and developmental psychopathology taught in departments of psychology, criminology, criminal justice, law, and sociology and/or criminal justice training academies. |
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The Cost of Bad Behavior: How Incivility Is Damaging Your Business and What to Do about It $23.13 Why incivility at work is a bigger problem than you suspect In an accessible and informative style, Pearson and Porath examine the toll that bad behavior can have on otherwise well-functioning companies. And they reveal strategies that successful organizations are using to stop incivility before it takes hold. Whether it’s a standoffish coworker or an arrogant boss, incivility at the office doesn’t just affect the moods of a few employees; it hurts an entire company. Consider these statistics: 12 percent of all employees say they’ve left jobs because they were treated badly. Fortune 1000 executives spend roughly seven weeks per year resolving employee conflicts. And an astonishing 95 percent of Americans say they’ve experienced rudeness at work. Christine Pearson and Christine Porath examine the devastating toll that bad behavior can have on otherwise well-functioning companies. Combining their own scientific research with stories from fields as diverse as criminology, education, and psychology, they show how to spot the roots of incivility, rip them out, and create a culture of respect. They urge managers to stop making excuses, set a zero-tolerance policy, and lead by example. Bestsellers like "The No Asshole Rule" and "The Power of Nice" have shown the hunger for more civility at work; now "The Cost of Bad Behavior" shows exactly what to do about it. |
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Aggressive Behavior in Dogs $56.86 A comprehensive technical manual, written for dog behavior professionals. It discusses understanding aggressive behavior in dogs, functionally assessing the behavior and constructing systematic behavior change programs, as well as consulting skills and case management. Comprehensive and systematic, it favors a behavioral approach. It includes an extensive glossary and functional assessment forms. |
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